Just this morning before I went to bed at 7am (yes, 7 fucking a.m. in the morning. To most of you, it may not seem like a big deal, BUT IT IS TO ME. I fucking HATE sleeping when the sun’s up, and I repeatedly berate myself for doing such. Yet, I still do.. Due to a complete lack of self discipline and brains to think intelligently.) after a silly baking stint. We tried making Crème Brûlée. I’m not sure what transpired but it turned out to be more like Water Brûlée. I’m also using the term ‘we’ loosely, seeing how I didn’t do anything to help.
Anyway, back to the point of my statement (I’ve got to stop going off track). I was scrolling through Twitter while lying in bed, and I saw a particular tweet that really jumped out at me.
It said : You have two choices: Accept what you’ve been given, or go out and get what you want. Nobody likes a whiner.
It really struck me because there is so much truth in that statement. How readily we often simply whinge and complain about how life has short-changed us, all the while sitting on our asses and stuffing our faces with food, booze and nothing fulfilling?
How many of us actually have the discipline to get up off the couch and start doing something?
I’ve tried my hand at both scenarios. Getting up off my ass and starting up my business was the greatest accomplishment of my life till now, perhaps. But I’m also guilty of doing half-baked jobs. I never complete what I finish because I lack the discipline, drive and motivation to.
Which brings me along to another topic.
I’ve been presented with so many opportunities in life. SO FUCKING MANY.
And reminicizing sometimes brings to my attention how I didn’t utilize those opportunities to their fullest potential. No, I didn’t. I’ve never been courageous; I’ve never taken risks. Not big ones, anyway. I’ve always stayed in the safe zone because being susceptible and vulnerable is, perhaps, the most.. Frustrating feeling. Knowing that you do not have complete control of a situation and knowing that success is not set in stone is a daunting prospect, one I have shunned through all these years.
But recently, very recently, I’ve decided to take on a different view of life. I want to be the person who dares to dream big. I want to be the person who has the balls to put herself out there, despite the possibility of failure and rejection. I want to be able to suck it up and move the fuck on even if I’m faced with failure. I want to be so much more; do so much more.
If I died tomorrow, would I have made any kind of impact in this world? Would I, perhaps, have left my footprints in anyone’s life? Perhaps so. But these footprints would just be that – footprints. And that’s not enough for me.
When I die, I wanna go out in a blaze of glory. Like Bonnie & Clyde. Or Mother Theresa, for that matter.
When I die, I wanna leave this physical world with the knowledge that I’ve done my part and fulfilled my purpose.
Another abrupt ending to my monologue. Decided to upload Halloween pictures!
I went as a cat (again) because I’m too poor to buy a new costume. Pitiful, right? Donations are welcomed.
Look! A dog! Adorable, right?
So anyhooo.. I got drunk out of my mind and I have since told myself, NEVER AGAIN. NEVER FUCKING AGAIN. Ugh. Gotta start sticking to my damned resolutions.
2 comments:
I cant believe our parents let you out of the house in a leotard and fishnets........
SHUT UP, WHALE.
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