Because I am rich.

Sometimes I really wish I didn’t have the ability of higher thinking. Sometimes I hate how over-analytical my mind is. Often I wish I hadn’t been inculcated with a non-negotiable moral compass, or hadn’t been ingrained with a strong sense of right and wrong and black and white. Since I was a child, my parents have reinforced the moral obligations of a human being and the concept of ‘look before you leap’ deep in the recesses of my brain, so much that these traits have surfaced to bite me in the ass time and again.

It goes two ways, really – my moral compass often prevents me from achieving greater things in the worldly sense – in the arena of wealth, success and personal gratification. But although these moral obligations seem to be a hurdle in my quest for material success, they have, on the other hand, saved me from the fires of hell.

Religious analogy aside, these moral values have governed me along a road so straight and clean that I can safely say that my conscience and soul has nary a taint. Each time I stumble along the road, there always is a lamp post that never fails to beam me in the right direction – with every ‘correct’ step of the way illuminated.

But it does leave me to think – what if I had ventured into the unknown? What if I had, for once, ignored the nagging conscience that is the product of years of religious and moralistic knowledge that my parents have painstakenly drilled into my mind? Would I be more of a.. worldly success? Would I, then, be happier than I am now?

Perhaps.

But if I could turn back time and change any aspect of my life.. I probably wouldn’t. I don’t deny that I do covet the spoils of society – I am extremely materialistic and highly motivated by financial wealth, but I would never trade who I have become today for any of that.

I am rich – rich in love, rich in virtues, and rich in principles – things that money can never buy. Often I get envious of others who seem to have so much more in terms of worldly possessions and sometimes I question and lament how I have been shortchanged in this aspect by life.

But then I stop myself and think: what right do I have to complain? I may not have excess, but I truly have everything I need. Every single thing. A wise man once said, “what you want may not be what you need”. Far and few are the people who understand the weight that statement carries. I’ll admit that I personally can’t seem to fully understand or accept that statement, and I’m still trying everyday to come to terms with what I cannot change.

What gives one the right to whinge and whine about having insufficient when there are people in other parts of the world content with much, much less? What entitles one to question the right of others to have more and chalk it up to luck and unjust blessings? What gives one the right to be so god damned unappreciative?

Nothing. Nothing at all.

For I am blessed, and I am fortunate. Fortunate enough to recognize the gift of life that has been presented to me, and appreciative enough to bask in the intangible wealth that has been showered upon my family and I.

For in this arena, I am rich. In this arena, I am thankful.

For the greatest thing you’ll ever learn is just to love and be loved in return.