we are infinite.

Attended the Swatch party on Saturday.


This is I.. Behaving like an alcoholic.

Paprika Bandage Dress - Kisslocke

So.. Here I am, once again. More alone than before. Not in a physical sense – I do have people who love me. And for that, I’m thankful. But when I speak of being alone, I mean on a whole new level. Alone in my thoughts, alone in my head, alone in my mind.. Alone in my beliefs, alone in my way of life, alone in my perception of reality and my views of the future.

How easy it is to slip into the comfortable routine of life. I yearn for that routine, actually. I had it for the 10 months I spent with my ex boyfriend, and it was simple. It was uncomplicated, straightforward and I often found myself just.. Existing. I didn’t feel the need to search for more, yearn for more nor define my life. No, everything was peachy and I was at ease with the world.

Oh, I see how blind I was now that the wool has been pulled away from my eyes.

Being in a state of tranquillity with the knowledge and comfort of a partner to cushion any adversity that life may throw our way doesn’t mean that the world has stopped spinning. It doesn’t mean that time has stopped ticking, or that we should be allowed to stop questioning, or stop being hungry to make more of our lives.

What if I died tomorrow? What if I hit my pillow tonight.. Never to awake again? I would, of course, not be dead in the ultimate sense. I believe in eternal life – life after death. But what would my stint on earth have meant? Have I made an impact? Have I changed someone’s life for the better? Have I contributed to anything? Would my presence have made any difference.. At all?

Woe betide he who cannot discern his purpose and mission, for he shall be but a passing breeze.